1. Holding on to regrets and excuses.
You can’t always choose your experiences, but you can always choose how you feel about them and how you will allow them to affect your present and your future.
You do NOT need to be defined by the things you did or didn’t do in the past. Allowing yourself to be controlled by events of the past is the single most negative predictor of a life intoxicated by stress and regret.
Let the regret and excuses GO and stop looking backwards. It’s that simple. Too much negative attention given to the past and comparison to the present and future, leaves nothing but a mind filled with pain and suffering. It’s counter productive to living a peaceful life. Holding on to regret allows us to make excuses for why we have not succeeded in the past.
Almost all failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses.
“You rarely fail for the things you do. You fail for the things you don’t do, the business you leave unfinished, the things you make excuses about for the rest of your life.”
2. The need for constant control and have to all the answers.
Learning to accept the feeling of not knowing the future and being able to enjoy and appreciate the freedom in that experience is a primary key to living a life with peace of mind.
For years I didn’t get this AT ALL. I just couldn’t and wouldn’t have enough faith in myself and the universe to accept what could happen. I needed to know everything. Simply put this removed my power and my peace of mind.
Expanding your mind and your entire being to allow for an unpredicted future and a savoring of the journey and having faith in yourself and the universe helps to live a peaceful life.
3. The inflexibility to accept pain as an indicator for change.
Pain is a part of life, and life’s pains have many ways of making their way into your life.
Fear of moving on and taking the next step in your journey of life prevents many people from steering away from what is familiar and guiding them into the unknown. Fear is the guiding factor, that prevents most people experiencing a live filled with peace.
The pains experienced through trial and error can most certainly be overwhelming, as you learn the best way forward. Seeing this as a guiding tool rather than an obstacle is the greatest way to move into the journey of peace and away from anxiety and stress.
In doing this you can prevent the feelings of overwhelming devastation when everything that has been planned for falls through.
When we can change the way that we think about pain we can experience the positive benefit of pain. For pain allows our mind and body to experience the full contrast of living in the full wonderment of LIFE.
Think about it for a minute how much do we really begin to only appreciate things only after they have gone. In this example, we are simply experiencing the corresponding feeling of contrast. Now when you flip that right around and you see that pain as an indicator for the contrast of Happiness.
If you re-direct your thoughts to those that truly bring you peace of mind, you have effectively benefitted from the pain. In much the same way being grateful trains the mind to focus on the good rather than the bad.
4. Relationships with insensitive people.
In general people are extremely difficult to change. Throughout life there will be people who will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you poorly. The obsession with trying to change others or winning their approval is a fool hardy endeavor. It doesn’t bring you happiness or peace of mind and never will.
Consuming oneself with trying to change someones opinion of you or even just having hate for them, terminates any sense of peace that you may experience in other areas of your life.
Any time you spend on such negative thoughts will just be wasted energy, and any bit of hate you feel will , in the end, only hurt You.
5. Becoming Obsessed with Negative news.
As a recovering Reality TV producer, this is one of my favorites. I battled the crazy obsession with negative news for so many years. It affected me in such a bad way because I like many other sensitive people, can feel the pain experienced by others around me.
The key is to remember what what we are shown on tv and in the news papers is sensationalist and designed to bring eye balls to the media. Pure and simple.
It’s designed to be horrific to grab your attention and hold it in a very hypnotic rhythmic manner. Trust me when I tell you the IDIOT box is called that for a reason. The focus on perspective is imperative in this situation. Knowing that it NOT all bad news out there. For behind every horror story is a wonderful story of incredible happiness love and success that has not garnered the attention of the media outlets because marketing dictates horror brings more attention than love.
I cannot begin tell you how many clients I have worked with who didn’t realize it until after a therapy session and or age regression hypnotherapy, that they were experiencing pain and stress from watching or reading negative news. FACT!
6. The false belief that you will be happy when you get your desires.
Fulfillment is not a matter of achieving a specific goal. It is a matter of mindfully enjoying the process required to achieve that goal. Fulfillment is derived from focusing your life around authentic intentions, ideas and activities that speak to your purpose.
When intentions are clear, consistent and meaningful, you can more easily attract fulfillment and joy into your life, whether you achieve your goal or not.
7. The Measure of personal success by money or possessions.
We’re bombarded with images of monetary success, with the implication that this stuff somehow elevates personal value.
Is your self-worth is connected to owning, and getting physical possessions. Success, happiness, and peace of mind have very little to do with gaining physical possessions.
Success and happiness is gained by learning to laugh often and love without condition. Joy and confidence comes from self respect and respecting others.
Constant focus on the appreciation of the wonderful things that surround us and make us feel happy and successful invariably leads us to peace. To attract amazing people and mutually beneficial situations give us peace of mind and instantaneous pleasure.
This is what makes a successful life. This is precisely how happiness and peace of mind are attained.
8. The need to keep status quo. Resistance to change.
People and life’s circumstances come and go. The world does not stop turning for anyone and it moves faster and faster as we age.
More often than not changes occur that are beyond our control. The significance of lasting affects come from the way in which we respond to them rather than the changes or events themselves.
Successful people who live in a peaceful space, use such changes to develop and grow. It’s more often than not times such as these, that enable people to really evaluate their lives and their personal expression of authenticity. Learning to live life not for others, but for themselves, ultimately brings about peace.
Sources: Tony Robins and Drew Lesser